SOMETIMES I'M A CAKE

If you have any topics you’d like me to write about, please submit them! I would be happy to comment/discuss any topic as it is relevant to asexuality/sexuality in general.

kitfluff asked: Just because it's not a physical, tangible thing doesn't make it any less real, or changeable. You might as well ask why sexual orientation like straight/gay exists - why be turned on by one but not the other?... So yeah. Those are my thoughts, but of course that's just from my experience. XD I hope I wasn't repeating too much of what you already knew, and that I helped!

Sorry for the confusing looking response. I’m still getting a hold of this answering questions thing.

First of all, kitfluff, thank you so much for your response and your kindness in explaining your feelings on the subject! I can definitely understand in a sense the dysphoria that comes with misgendering, and your examples really brought that to light.

I think the difference between your examples and gender, and the reason that gender is so confusing to me, is that your examples are all genetic/biological, as well as clearly defined. Genetically, someone gets different shades of skin; sexuality is caused by biological urges towards a certain type of person. Furthermore, while I don’t wish to police anyone’s sexuality - I have no intention of doing so! - oftentimes it is clearly defined. If you are sexually attracted to members of the opposite sex, you are heterosexual, and so on and so forth.

I guess the issue is I don’t understand the physical manifestation of gender, and I don’t understand what “masculine” and “feminine” mean. I think part of my issue with understanding gender is that I don’t really identify as any gender - so feeling strongly “male” or “female” or a third gender is not something I have any experience doing. So if gender is a “feeling,” then it may be impossible for me to understand unless at some point I do identify as… something.

Still, thank you for your time and your response! It provides a different perspective on things, and that is always welcome. :)

Alright, I’m going to make a post about gender, both in terms of my own gender, my general opinion of gender, and in the process I’m probably going to ask a question or two out to the aether to find their opinion. If I offend anyone with this post, I apologize sincerely. That is not my intention - I simply want to talk about my experience with gender and get clarification from others on one large point.

I’m going to spoil the post for everyone by giving the TL;DR upfront: I don’t get gender.

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i am not good at blogs whoops!

:’D

By request.

My definition of asexual is thus: someone who does not experience sexual attraction to another human being. It does not indicate anything concerning libido/sexual drive or romantic identification.

In my case, I do also have a very low sexual impulse. I don’t feel a biological NEED for release like some people do. To my understanding, those asexuals that do have a high libido generally sate themselves via masturbation, but given my own lack of sex drive, I can’t speak for them. I personally do not masturbate as I feel no need to.

As for my romantic orientation… I would consider myself to be either panromantic or aromantic. Gender, to me, is entirely irrelevant. That said, I don’t know if I’ve actually experienced “romantic” attraction - I find the idea to be hard to pin down and I can’t figure out exactly how to classify different types of attraction. At the very least, if I were to experience romantic attraction, I would be fine with cuddling, kissing, etc. I would also probably be fine with sexual relations, in the same way that one side of a couple would be perfectly fine with watching the other’s favorite movie, even if they just thought it was okay. It would be about making my partner happy and enjoying making them happy.

That is my off-the-cuff view, at any rate.

idek I just wanted to do this because why not

so internet if you have any questions to ask of an asexual person

I’m here